I Will Miss Them As They Are Today

I often wonder if I am really cherishing each moment.  Like, I enjoy it, but am I holding on to every second?  As the kids approach their birthdays, it is all too clear how fast time is passing.  I am excited for the new things to come, but I am going to miss them.  I am going to miss toddler Olivia and preschooler Will.  They will never be this little again.

One day, William will be too cool to hold my hand.  He won't sit in my lap.  He won't demand a hug and a kiss whenever I drop him off at school or tuck him into bed.  He will always be my baby, which he agrees, but it will be different.

He is a special kind of sweet.  I hope that never changes.  I hope the sweetness that he carries today, he will take with him always.  I cannot adequately express just how much I love my boy.

And Olivia....

Do I remember her as a baby?  It seems she was never a baby.  She was on the go, ready to move since she was born.  I remember her lifting her head off of me in the hospital, always alert.  She was ready to start her life.

Olivia challenges me like I never expected.  I sometimes wish her to age just a bit....just enough to grow out of her disobedient monkey self.  But I fear, I will regret those wishes.  With each temper tantrum (and she does have a big temper), with each climb, with each snatch of my toothpaste, it is just a sign of her being little.  One day, she will listen.  One day, she will stay close to me when I ask.  But for now, she is independent and strong and spunky.  I don't want that to change.  As stressful as she is, she is also extremely sweet.  She loves giving hugs and kisses and saying "iwuvooo"  I will miss her.  I will miss toddler Olivia.  One day, she will talk.  A lot.  I will maybe miss the current phase where she is still learning to talk and her words are still being formed.

Sure, there will be little girl Olivia, preteen Olivia, teenage Olivia.  I hope she carries with her the independence that was apparently ingrained in her DNA, but remains sweet as well.  I hope that temper evens out over time and she can better use words.  I love my girl.  My little Livi girl.

I am so excited to watch the kids grow.  I will look forward to each new stage, but I will miss the ones they leave behind.  I love my kids.  My greatest prayer, my greatest wish, my greatest desire is just to live my life, beside Steve and watch our children grow.  If God grants me that tremendous honor, I will live a blessed and happy life.